Oh, yeah. I totally get it. There have been many times between episodes when I believed that all the mood swings I'd been through were only figments of my imagination, or at most they were only minor blips on the radar. I didn't worry about being "cured" because I'd never been ill in the first place. In fact, I went through something like that recently---I'd been stable for almost a full year and thought perhaps I'd exaggerated my symptoms. But then I had a mild mixed episode earlier this month, and it reinforced the reality that I do have an illness that is going to come back, over and over again, even if I take all my meds and go to therapy and do all the other healthy lifestyle things.

It doesn't mean I have to suffer constantly or that I can't live a satisfying life. I'm stable far more often than I have episodes. But every now and again, I'm tempted to go off my meds and see what happens because I don't FEEL sick and the other mood swings I've had weren't really all that bad...

Then I realize I'm full of it and continue being compliant. I don't really want to find out what it would be like to be off meds.