Hello skizzle360nw: I'm sorry your life has gotten off to such a difficult start. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support. I see this is your first post. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

One additional forum you may want to check out will be the addictions forum. I would imagine you will find a number of members there who have had experiences similar to those you describe:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/addictions/

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!