I think that is the third major change in his life....first the end of his job (even if it was his decision), second his brother saying he couldn't live with him anymore, and third you backing away from the relationship.

This seems like three major losses. Its hard enough for someone to go through one loss, maybe the end of a job or changing living arrangements or their partner needing space, but when all three happen at once, it just seems like it would be too much to take.

I am not blaming you in the least, but I think that perhaps you weren't there when he needed you the most, and that was sort of the point where he just said "enough is enough" and shut himself off from you completely.

Again, I'm not blaming you as its not your fault. You are struggling to manage your own health issues. I think it might be a matter of really crappy timing for all of this to happen so close together.

Could you try talking to him and explaining more about why you did the things you did and that you didn't want to push him away completely?