Ok.

I need to just get this out, because I feel like my heart is about to leap out of my chest, or do a samba while still inside.

I posted about our landlord situation. For a refresher for anyone who wants to know:

They gave us an eviction notice for late rent. We arranged to pay them, today, and they would let us stay.

Well, on TOP of that, because my ex/roomate didn't get his bank information in on time to his new job, I am worried that he won't get paid. It happened last payday, and although it seems to me that they can't just refuse to cut him a check, they did last time.

Well he went to work today with the expectation that he was going to get a check.

Now let me go into some further detail.

The other day he told me that he was told if he got his bank information in they would cut him a check. Well he did get it in yesterday, so sounds like everything is ok.

Then today he tells me he "wasn't told" he wasn't getting a check, therefore he must be getting a check. Which is it?

So i told him before he went to work to call me to let me know if he got his check, because I am afraid if we do not pay today, or at the latest tomorrow, we will have to be out of our apartment by wednesday.

He hasn't called.

I don't know if I am making this out to be worse than it is but I am FREAKING OUT. I can't call him right now because he works in a restaurant and it is close to supper time and they will be busy.

I am very, very very very very very(ect) worried. It MAY just turn out fine, but what if it doesn't? Then I will need to find a place to live within five days.. and a way to move all my stuff. This won't happen, and I am terrified I will lose everything I own once again ( It has happened to me in another situation a few years back) and I am just spiralling into total anxiety over this situation. I don't know what to do.

I know I have to be patient and I will know for sure when he gets home from work, but its the scary feeling that when he gets home he is going to inform me that he did not get a check that freaks me out. God, what would I do?

And i HATE that he seems so casual about it. For god's sake, even if he doesn't care about himself, I am PREGNANT right now, with HIS baby, and that should mean something shouldn't it?

Two more months and I will get enough social assistance to move out on my own. I just cannot do it right now (right now I only get 450 a month - not nearly enough for an apartment so I have been between here and my moms). The other thing I have to think about is the possibility that if everything comes crashing down i have three wonderful kitties that I don't see what I could do with - besides taking them to my moms, but then I would have to arrange travel within that five days too or give them up to the spca - a thought I cannot even handle.

I need advice to at least get through this day without having a freaking cow or eight or nine cows.

This coupled with the wonderful black and white thinking I have such a problem with leads to EVERYTHING turning into a complete crisis, which this is. Even though i don't know anything yet. I suppose not knowing makes it even worse?

Augh. Help.