I'm mostly sad about my inability to express myself. I've had thoughts that I don't think I can ever share with my parents because the thoughts are about them. Then I just end up feeling like a terrible person for even having these thoughts in the first place. I used to be angry all the time, and I would kind of go through my days with this burning hatred and anger towards my father. But now I'm just tired. I'm tired of being angry, tired of hating him so much, and tired of hating myself because of the way I feel.