Quote:
Originally Posted by Fallen.Star
I feel like its more than that though. I'm not trying to "blame" it on any conditions, just wondered if it might contribute. I know its natural for things to settle after the honeymoon stage, it becomes less intense. I can tell my feelings have changed to the point where I'm concerned. I was very happy at first with how clingy, loving, and how much we texted and talked. How much we said this to one another. Now I get irked and irritated at times. It causes me stress, and I wonder if I should continue this relationship. I feel lost. But then I worry if I did terminate it, would I always wonder what if and regret it. What if this is it? The one? And I just screwed everything up? Its so hard to explain how I'm currently feeling about it. I do love and care about him greatly. I don't even wanna reply at this point, I obviously just can't explain anything right. Can't ever get words out, can't express my feelings.. But whatever, what do I have to lose.  |
You mentioned you got out of an abusive relationship...it kind of sounds like you got right back into one. He gets upset if you don't text him within a certain amount of time, you have to text all day long, he is constantly clinging to you and telling you he misses you and loves you...and you two haven't even met yet...
I've done long distance relationships and online relationships before, and I feel it's very dangerous ground to get involved in an online committed relationship before the two of you have met. The way people come off in text and online is very different. Do you two talk on the phone as well or Skype? How old are you and how old is he?
He does sound very controlling and also very clingy. Also, it seems kind of premature to be out of the honeymoon stage at only 9 months of a relationship. If you guys are talking constantly throughout the day, every day, no wonder you are losing interest. There is no mystery any more. There is nothing new for you two to say to each other. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, it's not just a saying.
Considering you just got out of an abusive relationship, I would put the brakes on and lay down some boundaries for the relationship so it doesn't run away too fast. Tell him you will only text him after work or school or whatever. And maybe only when you have "dates." As in, you both schedule time to Skype on Friday night, and that's when you're going to tell each other everything from throughout the week.
You need time to devote to yourself where his thoughts and ideas aren't intruding on yours.
Good luck,
seesaw