For work my big worry, being a software engineer, is that it is now the end of my career. Just feels like all this things i've worked for are all slipping away.

My wife is supportive but they are limits. She wants children but part of me feels it would be unfair to have children considering I dont know that I will be able to properly take care of them or provide for them. I can't expect she will necessarily want to say if I can't provide her with what she needs, and I don't expect her to compromise.

I don't expect medication to fix everything but nothing had more than a marginal effect. I never expected things to get fixed overnight, but 12 years later I would expect more progress. Starting to feel more and more like I will end up alone, jobless, broke and a ward of the state...

Sorry for being so pessimistic, it gets real hard to see the positive when there has been little to encourage me in the last few years.