I think that expecting him to hang on by a string isn't fair to him. It's not that you told him the whole truth from the beginning. You find it unfair that he said it "crashed and burned" but did you give him reason to think anything else? I'm not saying this to be mean but to be honest. here is how I see it. You didn't ask for time, you didn't say you needed a short break to work through things etc.

On the one hand you speak ask if you knew this could be part of the depression phase you're in, but you didn't explain that first and allow him to work with you on getting space and time to work through it. You broke off the engagement and the relationship. There is a certain finality to a break up. I am going to assume that your words that you used implied a permanent break up at the time you said it. Please don't be angry with him for respecting your desire to break up. If anything he did the honorable thing in expecting respecting your wishes and letting you go.

I know that things were probably confusing for you and I can even understand rushing to the point of breaking up in the heat of the moment but, in truth, it was handled badly. What you probably needed, as I already said was space and time, but you cut that short by breaking up. he is probably broken hearted. He is also in a wheelchair so more than likely suffers from self esteem issues as it is. This may have been more devastating than you understand it to be.

I don't know if there is a way to get this guy back but I am guessing if he's a good guy and the one for you that trying to talk to him and making him understand that you made a mistake in how you handled the situation would be a good idea. despite what some people think, I do believe most people have a forgiving side, especially for those they are in love with. I think there is hope