Things changed over time for me with regular T but there were major changes and losses in my life too. Kashi sounds like a T you could talk to about though ? I was just talking to my EMDR T today about the similar approach he has that make it a bit easier to make things real , tangible and human. My T is transparent and self discloses - he says that's the way he does therapy , that he's not God and wants his clients to see him as human.