Morning couch. I am in my little room.

Mom called me after I got home from CVS last night. I don't know why I answered...I guess I just wanted to be sure she was okay. I got to hear more crap my step-dad is doing. Originally, he said all she could have is the car and the dog. He called and left her a voicemail yesterday afternoon saying that was no longer possible, that everything is his and she will get nothing. He's upsetting her, yes she has a lawyer that will take care of as much as she can, but my mom still does not need my stepdad's BS. And by telling me, my mom is involving me. Grrrr.... I have enough problems of my own, I don't need anything added to it.

I'm thinking about texting pdoc to ask if the local outpatient part of the local mental health hospital takes walk ins for counselling or if I'd have to have an appointment. My T is always booked and cannot fit anyone in at times like these and I want to talk to someone. I don't think I need to go IP, I just want to talk to someone to try to relieve some of the stress. I thought about using the EAP from either job, but all they do is set you up with a counselor for appointments, not immediate "help". I just feel like talking to someone not involved who does not know either of my parents. I can't talk to anyone at work (school job) because my mom used to work here and my step dad used to be principal at an elementary school that feeds into my school, so they are both known by many people here, plus I don't trust anyone here not to blab to someone else. I just want an outside party to talk to. I hate all this garbage that is being laid on my shoulders that is not even mine. Why must I be pulled into the situation. My mom did the same thing when she diviorced my dad, pulled me in and I was only in high school. My dad did too...at least this time it is only one side pulling me in and not both. I just want all this crap to be settled and done with.

I have my own issues I am trying to handle right now, this garbage with mom's life is not helping at all. I guess I could tell her I don't want to know and not to tell me, but then she might get upset and think I don't care about her. It's a complicated situation.

I think I am going to find my appointment reminder card in my purse for my next appointment with pdoc to get his cell number and text him. I normally email him, but that may not be seen for a bit of time, texting would get to him sooner. I don't know...maybe I shouldn't, I don't want to look like I am becoming unstable. I just want it all to go away.