Erebos, thank you for your reply. Your absolutely right about my child and I love what you wrote.

He his definitely making sense to only himself spiritually and I see a lot of contradiction in what he say's. There's no room for questioning him either, he gets agitated and tells me I need to make my own research and find my own answers.
He said this spirituality passion, obsession started when he was 14, his 32 now. He does or did belong to some site where he would "read" people. His mom even told me she looked at everything he had wrote on that site and said it was surprisingly very good. He grew up in a family where the Spanish grandmother practiced psychic and magic.
I have a feeling his now back onto some similar website where he can connect with people sharing the same spiritual vision. What gets me is if his so passionate and obsess about it where was this for the last 5 years? Cause he did not show any interest or talk about any of this what so ever up until now.

When this all started a month ago he made a huge mess in his family, made everyone mad at everyone. So right now his mother refuse to talk to me. His father and aunt does talk to me but like everyone in the family they just know that's this he just needs to hit rock bottom and that they will than need to call the hospital. They just suggest to take a back seat and to be there to support him when he reaches out to me. Right now his not talking to none of them.

They do not encourage his spiritual conversation at all, and that's why he pushed them all out, knowing that they don't listen, don't understand and will just lock him up tp be drugged again.

I'm exhausted ! I'm afraid to tell him how I feel, I think it's better to wait that he "lands" but at the same time, this is eating me alive and it's really hard to comprehend that even despite the illness he does not realize how much arm his causing.