Good on you not.dead.yet Of course you are lovable,I wish you lots of love from others and lots of self love too,do you know when I started loving myself and the inner child inside me that was enough for me,I didn't need or crave love from anyone else.Being loved by someone else is also wonderful though and something I hope you will be blessed with in abundance too.Just to know though self love fills any void or emptiness and helps us feels whole and nourished too.