dear freesia, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. to lose her unexpectedly. you must still be in shock. and you haven't even had time to fully grieve for her due to all your obligations. and the anticipatory grief of losing your father, your other best friend. to feel you might be alone after he passes. I understand that feeling. have you considered talking to a grief counselor? and like the other posters, I too feel you have made the right decision in leaving work to help care for your father. you will never regret that. as for the money part, I remember after my mother passed away, we hired a man to help with cleaning her apartment. he told us that he became a housecleaner so that he could have flexible hours because he wanted to care for his elderly parents. i hope you will be able to work everything out. may the strength that your parents' love nurtured in you sustain you through this very different time. wishing you well.