This also sounds like me back in October last year. I nearly terminated with both my T's but went and talked to them both about it ( a lot of trauma had been triggered ). It went well with both of them and I'm now in a much better place. One said to me " You have so much trauma - please come in so we can work on this ". That was HUGE. Good advice from Sarmas I think. I also hope you will talk to your T about this. It's painful but can be healing. I know I'm in a much better place now.