I've been hungering for my sig. other, who depends on me a lot, to say something nice . . . something appreciative. I told him that. Nothing. We are basically ignoring each other all day today.

I am demoralized. I'm the type who loves a pat on the head, or a pat on the back. He's known me for so many years. Either he's learned nothing about me, or he knows and just refuses to bother.

I feel so bad. He's unwell and dependent on me for everything. This week I drove him to four doctor appointments. All he could say, yesterday, was: "When are you going to go to the bank and deposit some checks for me?" I said, "I'll get to it. We've been busy."

So, today, I'm ignoring the stack of mail he wants me to go through. I've been in bed most of the day. He's watching TV. I'm sure he's wondering: "When the heck is she going to snap out of it?"

I'm hurting myself, brooding like this. I want some recognition. I want to be praised and told that I'm valued. My birthday was pretty much ignored.

He won't change. He'll just stare intently at the TV. If I go sit in the living room, he'll pass some remarks about what program he's watching . . . like everything is fine and that's his attempt at normal conversation.

He absolutely will not tell me I'm special (to him, at least) and that he's so glad I'm here. If I get dressed and say I'm going out, he'll just act like, "That's fine. Do what you want."

This is a very long relationship. Many years ago, when we first becane involved, he had serious difficulties that I helped him out of. Gratitude was never his strong point. So why should I expect anything different now?

His ex-wife and adult children told me years ago that he was "a pain in the @$$." They said, "Do what's good for you and stop worrying about him." They pretty much told me, "He's not worth it."

He told me long ago that I'm a moody nut. That's pretty accurate. But I improve so much from a little positive attention. So I'm waiting . . . waiting for it . . . waiting in vain.