I am married and soon to be divorced, if we decide to go ahead with it. Communication between an Asian and an American is difficult but I thought being a man who has studied so many languages I could overcome it. And almost did. She speaks better English now too. But Mandarin by itself is not as subtle a language as English.

Customs also are a real problem. Boiling down to one problem now: calling when you can’t come home or stay late. We Americans as couples try to stay in touch, if we love each other. She thinks nothing of working late and staying at a friend’s house or even at the store (a massage parlor) and not even call. It worries me sick. The place is seedy and rough. One woman there has already been mugged.

Any ideas? I have already consulted a divorce lawyer who speaks Mandarin and she says don’t worry about it. But there are other issues too.