I use to feel this way, when I always had an illness.It
usually occurs once a year, if not more. I have seen so
many different doctors for various ailments. Then I wondered how come this has happened to me.Even when
I take care of myself. There is no special reason for me having to deal with all these different ailments.
This has taught me to be more assertive,and ask a lot of questions.
I am single, therefore I have to take care of me. I don't think it is selfish. It is a fact of life.
You have to take care of yourself first.

I know my shrink didn't believe how bad my (depression) was,until I broke down in tears. So, yes I have been judged. It is ironic that you are the first born ,so am I.

I usually say I'm the reject one, of course I am kidding.
Don't get me wrong, I am very,very, thankful for everything in
life. It can get worse.Sorry, I went on and on.I wish you the very best and hope everything works out.