Don't you just hate how waiting for an email from your T feels like it takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r ?

It's like time suddenly slows down and every hour that passes feels like a day....

And you start wondering if they are going to reply at all.....

Then you start thinking they're not going to reply because they don't care about you at all...
That you are nobody anyway...
That you are pathetic...
Your life sucks....
You are such an idiot,so stupid...
You start thinking screw them,I am quitting therapy,they don't care anyway,I am not putting myself through this anymore....

And you check..and check your email...even check your spam folder because maybe somehow their reply went there...it didn't...

You tell yourself you are so pathetic because you keep checking...

Then you start thinking maybe they are real sick,maybe something happened to them,they have always replied before...

You have all sorts of worse case scenarios running through your head...
You wonder what you would do if something serious happened...
Would you go to their funeral?...
How would you manage without them?...

You check your email again...refresh...refresh...refresh...

You wonder why they haven't replied when you are trying to go to sleep...
You start thinkjng they don't care...
You can't sleep because you are such a loser,why would you expect anyone to care?...

You check your email in the middle of the night when you gotta go pee...

You tell yourself that's it,you are not checking again...
They obviously are not going to reply...
You tell yourself you don't need them anyway...
Maybe you shouldn't have emailed in the first place,you're fine now...
You can make it on your own without them...
Maybe you don't even really need therapy...
Yeah,I am fine,I am doing so much better!!

Then you get the reply and you're like Yay!
They do care!

And then you feel stupid for all that you put yourself through waiting for that reply.And you swear to yourself you will never email again...

...Or is it just me that does that kind of stuff?