...I spend so much of my time in character that I sometimes just want to walk away from the whole thing and live out the rest of my life as a hermit on a mountaintop, but when I am not in character, I am alone and lonely, and the only time I feel even somewhat accepted is when I am not being me. So on one hand, I feel driven to be the businessman, the promoter, the entrepreneur and philanthropist, because this is the person the world accepts and likes, and I want to be accepted and liked. Who doesn't? On the other hand, I hate it. I hate that I have to play a role to be considered a member of society, that my true and honest self is somehow subhuman and unworthy of acceptance, let alone love or affection.[/FONT]