KD,
I just read this thread, and it is good that you are feeling better regarding your husband's trip. I'm sorry your daughter is having such a hard time.
I do think, however, that it is reasonable to postpone the trip to FL, and you were right to express your concerns!

When I was married and my dad was dying of colon cancer, at Thanksgiving, my husband took our daughter to his family's for the holiday, 6 hours away. I told him I needed to stay with my family because of my dad's condition, to which he replied, "Oh, he's not going to die..." But over Thanksgiving he did pass away, and I was alone with my dad trying to get him some help. It was horrific.
I was so resentful of his leaving, I didn't even call to tell him what had transpired, only telling him when he came home from his holiday. This was one of the few times he felt regret at his caustic behavior, but, unlike you and your husband, we didn't have a happy marriage.

Love
Patty