I'm glad you had your grandfather's love!

I have spoken of my fondness for my father before and I realize that I copied him in many ways, both good and bad.

Besides the obvious of graduating from the same university, joining ROTC (he was in Army ROTC, I was in Air Force ROTC); my relationship with my children has some similarities with my dad's relationship with his...

When Dad was gone, I could drive my mom so crazy sometimes that she would chase me around the house and really whack me good sometimes....
When Dad was home, she would ask him to spank me--he would take me to my room, talk to me and when I said I was sorry he would say, "Since your sorry, I'm not going to spank you--Don't tell mom." And we had many other secrets. I'm afraid that I have never disciplined my children much either and we have secrets. This sometimes is upsetting for H. I have been trying to be much less secretive than I used to be. It's not fair to H that I have been this way but it really is something that I just naturally have done without reflection. Only recently did I understand that it has sometimes been unfair and counterproductive.....