
Feb 07, 2017, 09:05 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2012
Location: Columbia,MO
Posts: 639
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in a turn of very very ugly events between me and my now ex fiance I have moved back in with my mother.
I admit now that most of the fault of the break up was mine since it involved me cheating on him...which I do feel horribly about a lot of it lead up from mis communication on both of our parts since I am poly and he is not and thing lead to a bad direction with a new partner I had gotten to know for quite some time.
I don't justify how I went about with things and I know a lot of my issues were not handled in a good way.
which is why I am making efforts now in my life to change a lot of things.
from all the items that were packed up and given back to me I have noticed what a horrible amount of things I have accumulated in just a short time. And I feel disperate to get rid of these items and lesson how much I really truly have.
what do I use? what do I not? do I need this really?
I feel like viewing things in this way is a healthy start for me and already a lot of my bad behavior in other aspects of my life are starting to improve. The one thing that does not help me is the fact that I am living again with my mother and instead of allowing me throw away or donate what I want she insist on going through bags I have already sorted through and said I don't want and I don't need.
I am going to move forward in my life and make improvements with or with out her help I know I have to do and I refuse to just allow my issues to hold me back. Admiting to my wrong doing is a big and scary step for me but I know that I have to do it....to help myself go forward wither its about the relationship or my PTSD or my hoarding habits that I think are clearly helped along by my mother and her influences.
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Dx:OCD, AD/HD-C and ADD kinda both, General Anxiety Disorder, Separation Anxiety Disorder,Abandonment Anxiety, Cycothymic disorder, or mixed bipolar, Border Line Personality Disorder,Histonic Personality Disorder, Dependent Personality disorder, eating disorder
]Rx:Lamotrigine 25mg twice a day for my mood stablizer as well as I am on Escitalopram 10mg 1 daily, Buspirone 3 times daily 10mgs
VT Student, CNA student, working HHA
for my father I think of you everyday
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