Yes, this friend is the only one I felt paranoid about. I always dread having him visit, because it brings back those feelings. Surprisingly, I made some progress after his last visit, because it forced me to confront my paranoia and see that it was unfounded. For better or for worse, I agreed to his travel plans, so I will see him in a couple of months.

I think part of the reason for my dread (besides the paranoia) is that I don't like remembering how much better my life had been in the past when we were close friends. It is easier for me to accept my present conditions if I forget about my past. That might be a factor in why I became psychotic after seeing him in 2009.