I'm glad you can at least say these things to us here on PC--you've got to say them to someone or they will eat you alive.
I have to ask (because depression lies to all of us): are you really responsible for everyone around you being hurt? Is it at all possible that everything bad isn't your fault? It sounds like you're doing your damnedest to be strong for everyone around you--what would happen if you weren't? If you let someone be strong for you?
I just had to ask these questions because depression has caused me to blame myself for many many things that--perhaps--I'm beginning to see weren't all my fault.
I hope you can see that possibility too