Since 2013, I've been struggling with speech and cognitive issues and it's been getting worse and worse over the years. All my doctors wrote it off as an anxiety disorder issue, but I no longer struggle with anxiety anymore but this issue isn't going away.

It's as if the coordination between my brain and voice has been scr*wed up. I can't control myself when I speak, I say the wrong words out loud even though I KNOW what I want to say in my head.

Like the other day, I wanted to say the word "book" and it took me a while before I could say it.

I say things that are completely grammatically incorrect (EG: "I brings the thing you asked!") and it's so frustrating because I'm a student right now, studying language and writing, which is the worst thing for me. I've ruined so many first impressions because I come across as someone who's... useless, basically. When, and I don't mean it in a boastful way, I used to be very good at what I do. Now I've lost it all. It's jammed in my brain and I can't it out.

I could go on about my speech issues, but I think you get it. And I also have issues with reading. I take TOO long to read. Too long. People have pointed it out, they make fun of me. When I read, sometimes I see words that aren't even on the page. When I reread it, the word's not there.

I thought this was an anxiety thing, but I could be with the person I feel most comfortable with, and feel absolutely no anxiety at all and it'll still happen, I'll still mess up. Everyone speaks to me so condescendingly because they think I'm unintelligent and it makes me feel so, so sad.

I want to go back to who I was. I don't even know why this is happening. No one will take me seriously because "anxiety". Jesus.