Hello there.

I have been off meds since 2013. I took Olanzapine (Zyprexa) and Viepax XR and after becoming physically active I felt hypomaniac. Had better mood, was more confident, felt like improved person and I lost a good deal of weight too.

I was told I have Bipolar but didn't know what type. Last summer in 2016 depression returned, I had frequent suicidal thoughts, doubt and stress. This is now not as much but last 3 months I did not want to start morning, lost interest, felt purposeless and have anxiety and panic attacks.

I visited new psychiatrist who based on my last meds taken that I mentioned above, prescribed Zyprexa to take one month and visit him. After scrutinizing leaflet I noticed that Bipolar Type 1 mentioned. There is no Bipolar 2 which I believe is the type I have because I do not recall manic episodes. I recall hypomania and depression. Could it be I was diagnosed with wrong type? The strange thing is that even with Zyprexa (which I think is meant to block much of dopamine secretion to prevent hypomania) back in 2013 when quitting I still felt great.

When I felt hypomaniac I wished I it would feel that way forever since I was a changed person. Someone I held in my ideal image and still do as I am into a self development. I had a lot of optimism, mental clarity, I would not feel unconfident, would not avoid and fear people and have panic attacks. I was that opposite version in my ideal image of myself.

What I fear is the type of Bipolar that I was diagnosed with as am unsure about and that going back to Zyprexa will make things worse. I am more or less today but do not have deep depression as frequently. I still have anxiety and panic attacks.

What's the worst that can happen with me going to Zyprexa 5mg per day? Thank you.