Buried anger that hasn't been processed? (PTSC Trauma(s))

Sometimes I when I am feeling badly I take it out on my spouse and he admits that he has days when he has done that to me. I haven't acted like that lately because I am much more stable than I have been for years.

In 2015, when I first started driving/walking, I would have these weird urges (that I didn't want to act on) to jump into oncoming traffic--it would sometimes then make me think of the moment I attempted (complete with how it smelled at that moment). I would stop concentrating on my driving totally--be in another place. I think I was still involuntaryly processing trauma because my attempt was scary but instead of feeling scared at all that day, I went into shock--I was completely calm (maybe 30-40 min) then lost consciousness.

With time, it goes away, but I did have a bunch of panic attacks and dreams before I got to that point. It might go away with time for you someday too.