I understand what you go through,and it's frustrating when people think you can just get over it if you try hard enough.

My T gave me this book,it might be worth checking out.I also think you need to talk to your T about it so you can begin working through your fears.Any therapist should be able to help you with that,but if yours can't then being refferred to someone who can would be in your best interest.

https://www.amazon.com/Prolonged-Exp.../dp/0195308506