I'm in grade 12, my final year in school. I am screwing up in school because I have no motivation to actually do my work, better myself, or really anything. I have these dreams of what I want to accomplish. I am extremely self critical of myself and everything has to be perfect and if I screw up in anything I just lose interest because im not good enough. Its ******** because I want to do great in school and I want to study but I cant focus for the life of me so I just dont.
I really want to succeed, I truly do and I WANT motivation so badly. I look at all of these other people that can study and push themselves where I want to be like that but I just cant.
Please dont even tell me to go out and force myself to do things because I literally cant even do that, i want to be able to have my own job someday, be independent, be somebody that people can look up to, but I cant dig myself out of my own personal hell which is my mind that tells me to not do anything but sleep.