Isn't some of it just human nature. As in we just crave it to a certain extent and people who are lucky enough to be handsome, intelligent, talented, have access to a lot of resources, etc. are more likely to hone their skills in this regard. And of course society teaches us to keep it "all reigned in" or to play certain roles to a certain extent. But I think our moms and dads play the biggest role of all in how we relate to the opposite sex. I think when your H or bf really loves his mom that could be a sign that they are loving towards women. So maybe we need to really appreciate our mother-in-laws on Valentine's Day!