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How is one not to HATE when they were abused beyond that of normal sexual abuse?

With out going into details that will upset others, make me sick, or get this thread closed I will just use a few words to describe my horror my hell - the source of my HATE (12 years long).

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1.) Bestiality (dogs)

2.) Three-some (all males)

3.) Object insertion

4.) Family (uncle, step father, cousins)

5.) Medical Sex - with painful experiments

6.) Sodomy (damage done)

7.) Sharing of ME with His Drunk Buddies

8.) Molestation as a baby (under 1 year old)

9.) BDSM (sick)

10.) Rape - Rape and more Rape

................................................................................. So SAD inside.