I hope you don't delete your post, you have as much right to be heard as anyone else here fuzzy

I have been under the mental health team for almost 5 years now. I have lost count of the amount of times I have been in crisis. Been in hospital too many times. And really I have not made any steps forwards. So in that sense I'm not sure they have helped me. Some of them really have tried, and sometimes it has made a bit of difference. The problem is that whatever progress I seem to make, it always ends up with me in the same pit of despair unable to claw my way out.

Last time I was inpatient in October it was such a waste of time that I think I felt worse coming out. And I completely shut everyone out determined to end it. For whatever reason I didn't, and I managed to break out of that state on my own. No idea how. I can feel it coming back though and am trying once again with the mental health team, but I do have that little voice niggling away just saying "what's the point? what are they actually going to do to help?"

I wish I knew the answer.