I appreciate everyone's insight. She does feel she has control. I was wanting to initiate the no contact rule but I have kids which makes it tough, cause I still have to deal with her on that accord plus I see her when we arrange pick up and drop off location. I am no longer talking to her beyond that as of today. She told me she doesn't trust me or my motives anymore. I think she is really selfish not to even try marriage counseling as she suggested she gave it Ten years. She is still acting distant and cold and I been back for 34 days now. I have orders to a clinic here for the next 3 years which will take me to retirement so God blessed me with that, so I can atleast have my kids. She tells me "You can do whatever you feel you have to do, it's your choice" and that she is focusing on her now, finishing RN school and taking care of the kids and "if I am still there through all of this, so be it. If not, she wishes me well and success". She said it's my choice if I want to leave and divorce but she has a hardened heart at the moment. She brought up all the issues she had with me throughout the marriage which made her feel the way she does. I can tell she has a lot of hurt, and her and resentment towards me from that and plus the texting incident as that is brought up a lot. Just going to give her space and hope she comes around and misses me. I did contact a lawyer, so I'm covered as far as that goes but I also don't want to end my marriage so soon with having any regrets.