I want to commend you on noticing that you are struggling and getting treatment. That is not easy by any means.

I did two cycles of DBT and am seeing an individual therapist as well. I am also in relationship with the love of my life. I can't tell you how many times my BPD has caused me to say and do things I regret. What has helped me with my relationship is to make him fully aware of what is going on. He knows my dx and the symptoms. When I tell him I am struggling with X criteria of the dx, it helps him to understand. I also use skills as much as possible to reduce my emotion driven behaviors.

I too don't like it when he wants to spend healthy time away from me. His friends seem like a threat to me. In those situations, I check the facts of the situation and accept that he needs to do this. He is not leaving me and he still loves me. Reminding myself of this and doing some self care helps me in those moments.

Please feel free to ask me anything else!