Quote:
Originally Posted by Luce
Hey, good on you for choosing to 'save your butt' over choosing to 'save your face'. I like your commitment to yourself. I have always admired that about you. Your commitment to Sonseearae has been a learning experience for me. You have her back. No matter what, you protect her with all that you have.
In that context I can understand why it is so difficult for you to not have realized or known that there were others. All I can say to that is that if it were best for you to have known, then you would have. It isn't a sign of 'failure' or weakness that you didn't know about these two before. I think it is more a sign that you are reader to face more difficult material.
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Thank you. For responding and for your response. I value your participation on this forum and like to think that we'd be friends if geography was more cooperative.
T and I have talked about it some and I was gratified that she knows me well enough to 'get it' but she nailed it...you are ashamed because you didn't know and knowing how unuseful shame is, you're feeling shame for feeling shame. Yup.
But you know, and I just realized this... there''s a good chance that Micah and Lori are aware of the shame and they know where it comes from. Their knowledge of that sincere feeling might serve us well moving forward as I try to bridge the gap and heal the wounds left there by neglect...so maybe shame has some value here after all.