Your husband is apparently being very selfish atm but that is part of the sickness. He is so wraped up in himself he doesn't see your pain. I'm not making excuses for him just saying.

My advice will be hard but you need to think about you. Just think of him as being gone for awhile, like on a business trip or such. The expectation, and inevitable disapointment, of constantly waiting to be with him again can tear you apart.

He wants space, give it to him. But don't just sit and wait. Try and put him out of your mind (not out of your heart) and go on about living. Enjoy the holidays, let yourself have a break from the worry. Set a time, a month, two months, when you will plan to see him again. Then move forward.

If he contacts you before then it will be a pleasent surprise. If not you can contact him at the time you had decided and confront him to make a decision. Is he going to work on the marriage or not. You will be in a better frame of mind then and will have given him his space.

Good luck,