I've been with my wife for 11 years now (12 years in April). Not only to we live together but we work together as well. We often find it hard to come up with stuff to talk about because we really can't just be like "x at work did this..." or "I did this at home..." because obviously she knows because she was there. So we talk about our hobbies to one another. We talk about work in detail (she's the front of the office and I'm an accountant so we're not really doing the same thing), we talk about books, sports, news articles. We try to focus on things we do independently and things that get us excited are things we like to share.

We also do date night once a week (except during tax season- she's lucky if she gets to see me at home for an hr or two between work and bed). We take vacations together... we just came back from a wkend in Phoenix because we went to see concerts (something we both like to do). This wkend we're going to Dallas for a hockey game.

As for our sex lives, we make it mandated that we AT LEAST have sex once a month... end of story. There's been times we're its the 30th and we force ourself to have sex... sometimes it turns into great sex and doesn't feel like a chore. We also flirt (touchy feely kind of things) a lot like we did when we were first dating. Yesterday after we got home from our trip she purchased a porno on demand out of the blue. Keep the surprise and spontaneous aspect of "the honeymoon" phase going.

Try planning little things out of the ordinary. Sometimes I just tell her to get in the car and we'll get coffee and listen to music while we drive aimlessly. Other times I I'll take her randomly to a bookstore to wander the aisles for hours, something that bores me but something she loves - it helps with conversations as well since she can talk about the books she looked at or purchased. Sometimes for no reason she'll take me to a comic book store or a game store so I can look around - again, another conversation starter.

I guess what works for us is keeping up the surprises and spontaneity involved. /Sure we fall into ruts, and sure we fall into routine, but it takes hard work to break out of that. I dunno if that helps any...