Someone's gonna have to explain to me how a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist emerges from training without a firm grasp on developmental issues and traumas. And then the client has the burden of educating them? OMG.

For the OP, this article is pretty interesting, though I have problems with some of it:
"Rage, Shame, and the Death of Love"
Bill Cloke Phd
http://www.billcloke.com/writing-sam...s/#development

"The child who experiences empathy identifies with these kinds of encounters and continues these behavior patterns with significant others in adulthood. However, if his parents failed to make an empathic attachment, or instead made rageful connections, he will yearn for empathic attachments but will lack the ability to achieve them."