Sorry my post wasn't published until the conversation moved on. Self harm is literally addictive, which is why a lot of my suggestions involved creating the same chemical sensation (with the cold shower) or physical action ("cutting" with a red pen). My therapist always talked about it like an addiction and I recommend approaching it like a legitimate one. I think yours should have dealt with self injury a lot, but she may react in a kinda extreme way because she works for a school :/