Maybe it's the "yes" or "no" that makes it sound like an order or something? "Talking that way shows hostility" is not advice, IMO, just an observation. But when it's preceded by "No" it sounds different. I'd say talk to him about it, good topic to discuss and connects to how you deal with others.

That said, definitely Ts should not tell you what to do, it's up to you how to live your life. They don't control you and shouldn't try.