Hey trail runner
You are not alone, 'me' is a tricky thing to peg down.
But you are 'you', always, just that sometimes you don't act like you, usually for reasons that are a consequence of your neurosis.
My advice...listen to your body.
The mind communicates through your body, if you are not being true to 'yourself' it usually manifests this conflict in a physical way, maybe a feeling in your belly, on your skin, in your heart, or a 'discomfort' in your mental state.
Pay attention to these feelings and act accordingly, this will lead you to your 'true' self.
What issues are you dealing with?