One last thing, you martyr yourself to your marriage.
You exclaim what a favour you did your wife by staying with her.

Did you really?
Here is a woman in severe distress, with obvious mental health issues and experiencing what sounds like quite intense trauma.
Yet you have been unable to help her.
Did you never think in all this timetable you weren't the one who was right for her?

You go on like she is happy being miserable.
Well how, from what you have described would she know anything else.
You never gave her the chance to discover if she could have been better off in other circumstances.
Oh and that overt sexual behaviour you described is very typical in victims of abuse.

I hope what time you have left together as a family goes smoothly. And genuinely hope you all have a better future.