Hi, this is my first post. I'm sorry, just need to tell someone. I don't even know where to start. I'm 23 and was diagnosed with social anxiety and depression.
I've been on SSRI for a year now.

Don't really want to write all about my depression but I need some help on how to deal with emotions. I have been in LDR for 1,5 years (we met IRL).
Everything was great until 5 months ago when we started to argue all the time. Everything makes me angry, my confidence is 0, I hate myslelf, I doubt every word said to me. When I have a problem with something I want to talk/aruge about it while my bf wants to let it go and be forgotten. It makes me so frustrated. I send him a millions of messages everytime that happens and he tells me to "stop being dramatic", "calm down" or something else. When that happens I feel like I am crazy, I hate myself for being like that but I cannot let it go. If I let it go I'll stop caring completly and I don't want that. I hate when I get frustrated because I want to hurt myself and I keep thinking how retarded I am and how everyone will leave me. I think about suicide a lot but I'd never do it as long as I have my family. He also thinks I am crazy when that happens because we are completly different and don't really understand each other that well. (he also suffers from depression). I don't want to break up because I love him.

I have tons of other issues I could write about but this is what makes me feel so awful most of the time.

Please share some advice, I'm going mad and think I'll turn paranoid shizo at the end or something