You mean like an original? I have come to think that my system does not have an original. I don't know when we started splitting up and all that, but we were young. I'm not sure when a child develops a sense of self, but in my case, it's more likely we never developed a single sense of self, rather senses of selves. But who knows. It seems like someone had to put us here... maybe it was just a function of the brain and the brain is really the original. I dunno. It can make my mind get to spinning.

We have a lot of fragments still left within us that have not been integrated. We also have a lot of fragments that have been integrated. They reside in a place in my head called the woods. The fragments that we have integrated (I happen to have a good amount of them in me, personally) have not really given me a more well rounded sense of self or even understanding. I don't know if it's a me thing or what, but they are so choppy and single... I don't have any better understanding of who I am beyond I was a person who had a jacked up childhood. And I already knew that. Heh. I don't know if it's because I am still not holding a bunch of fragments or if it would be the same if they all somehow became part of me... and I'd just get sporadically flooded with a bunch of incomplete thoughts that play out in my head like nonsense I can't grab onto.

I'm talking a lot... sorry. Short version, nope... my system has no me that I am aware of. And yeah, I think part of the whole healing process and living life instead of reacting to it is creating a me as time goes on.

-Veda