Bluesguy, There isn’t anything you are telling us that every one of us haven’t felt and lived in one fashion or another. We are really more alike than we are different. Alcohol FIXED it for all of us. Why in the hell would we have drank away our families, our friends our health, if booze didn’t give us a big payoff? We get it when you say, “I swore I'd never pick up a bottle again. And here I am today with all the cuts and bruises of the last time I drank.”

Find an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and show up. Untreated alcoholism never gets better on it’s own, it always gets worse. But there are many people just like you who are free of that damn obsession, join them. Into action bluesguy, that’s the key. Richard