I have spent years trying to hide my self harm.

I know that people now know, inevitable I guess after 12 years. But they still don't actually see it. I don't feel comfortable with that, even when they tell me it's ok.

But I have been getting really strong urges to self harm in places that I cannot hide. I don't know how long I can fight them tbh.

I don't want to make it obvious, but I find myself craving that somehow. I don't get it.