Welcome! You wrote something I can sort relate to, years ago. "Xanax which I very quickly ... spiraled out of control. " I didn't become addicted to it. Looking back 40 years or more, I realize now that it made me hypomanic. I'd never felt so "high" before, and after 3 days, I knew something was wrong, so quit taking Xanax. Unbelievale that they are still prescribing it -- or I guess it may be that some docs don't know anything about this med, or about bipolar. I had gone to the particular doctor who gave me the Xanax because I had sinusitis and bronchitis. I thought she gave me a med for those conditions -- she gave me Xanax instead. I guess she must've thoght I was a weird or crazy person! What a nerve!!! Geez. One has to totally know what to look for in a doctor. Here's my present example, about a special surgery I will have in April. It is a very delicate surgery, and takes a totally expert surgeon to do it right, without the possibility of doing a lot of serious damage! So I did some online research! Found an actual forum for the exact condition I have!! Amazing! The advice my peers there gave is this: "Find a doctor who does this particular surgery at least 50 times a year," they said. "Lots of doctors do this surgery -- because they make a whole lot of money doing it! But most of them do very few of this kind of surgery" So the first specialist I went to said he was going to send me to the surgeon in the particular clinic/hospital where he worked. I said I needed someone who did 50 of the surgeries a year -- see how informed I was - very proud of myself! So -- that doc referred me to a different surgeon!!! I love her. Before I made my first appointment with her, I asked her front desk person if she did 50 of those surgeries a year. The phone receptionist said, "She does a lot more than THAT! She does three or four A WEEK.!