Okay... nachos done. They didn't seem to have much flavor. Dunno whats up with that... I used seasoning and the salsa wasn't mild. *shrugs* At least I managed to force down a plate full of them. Seriously food, I have a bone to pick with you sometimes... anyway... time line stuff...

what did i neglect to put in there from the end of 92... more 92 stuff from aug to dec...
- J. my aunt J. i forgot how much she was around. she had the house in my city. i went to visit her a lot and talked to her a lot.
- IB lived in the house on the president street and the cops took me home from there one night and the cop ran the stop sign and almost smacked the stuff out of that car... cop was going something stupid like 50 in a residential.
- I spent a lot of time at IB's house on the pres street... mistaM had the issue with the dog LD and i had the trash bag wedding. IB was one of the people i could sometimes see then other times my mom sent cops after me for seeing even after she said i could go there.
- it was 92 when i got introduced to that guy next town over who sold me the dirt cheap large amounts of pot. i sold stuff that 1st semester of school so i could eat, get school supplies, buy smokes, and have free pot... along with cloths, shoes, a coat, shampoo... everything. My mom told my dad she gave me 100$ for school stuff and i blew it on drugs, but she never gave me any money... dad believed her.
- it was 92 when i did that stuff to my arms and painted the hallway. No one put me in the psych hospital for that one though, that was also when i pulled the g** on my dad and no one ever said anything to me or anyone about that... i think.
- that was also when C talked to me about ghosts since i was still trippin over my grandpa dying in the formal living room. he stayed with us during the end and hospice was there and all. but he died back when i was in jr high but was still messed up about that whole thing. he was one of the few nice fam members we had and he was in a lot of pain or out of it the whole time he was in that living room. i was seeing things i thought were ghosts during that time.
- oh and early fall of 92 was when i got in the fight with that girl outside the store. i had to get pulled off her. it was pretty bad what i did to that girl. one second i was on her and the next i was in P's car... took five guys to yank me off that girl. all over some nasty words she said to me... same stuff JT, my mom, A, and all them would say to me. Huh. did not think that talk set me off... guess it did.

I think that's it for the 92 stuff. Ok... 93 stuff.

feb - may 93
- i got the yank boot combo from school in jan or feb.. i dunno... but was on probation from everyone i spent time with and not in school so i spent those months mosty in my room alone. i think. i know i saw IB, A(ex husband), SW, maybe SR, and some talk with g girl but she had stuff going down with her house/life so i didnt see or talk to her much if i did or was allowed to. dunno. C was still around sometimes and so was M at the beginning.
- IB told me he was HIV positive and i flipped, got drunk, and pierced my own nose (to this day still have that piercing i gave myself that night).
- D had an aids scare during that time to i think. he had one, but not sure when. was freaky because both me and SW dated him. i think SW was still dating him during that time. he ended up testing negative though and then neg again later but it was freaky for a bit.
- C and i flipped out on M when she was saying all that awful stuff about us and we told her to go to hell. M and i had been friends for years and close so that messed me up.
- aunt J got thrown down a flight of stairs by that guy and her teeth got knocked out. she came to live with us during that time until she and my mom got into it over church/jeebus and my mom tried to beat her senseless and then threw her out. J and i were closer during that time living in that house together. Neither of us reacted well to what happened to her. she had to go live in that apt building IB had lived and she had to do some stuff to be able to pay rent.
- i flipped out and got put in a psych hospital somewhere in those months, that was the second time i went to that particular psych hospital.
- IB moved out of that apt. building and vanished for awhile and no one knew where he went. LD was living with him in that time and she ended up leaving the city after IB vanished and had to move kinda far away.
- found out during that time that C was going to move to texas.
- i ended up doing some stuff i regretted with A (the ex husband)
- A got all jeebus-y on me and threw me across a room one day in the name of the lord for being a slu* who needed to submit and be corrected.he was real inconsistent during those months, sometimes being cool and level headed other times taking his issues out on me.
- during winter was when g girl had that party and i got pulled in the bathroom with her dude and her brother tried to get up on me when i was passed out. g girl blew up on me that night. or was it after she had babikinz. crap. i dunno.
- oh yeah and my paternal grandparents offered to let me live with them in a different town but told me i would have to follow rules and it bothered me they would even say that to me. i was also annoyed they never tried to get me out of there until i was 15... like too little too late, folks, thanks anyhow.

summer 93 so thats june- aug
- probation officer suggested summer school and the outpatient rehab thing which was stupid because i wasn't really doing anything for a few months there but she said it reflected good on me so when i left the house at 17 and 6 mo it would be easier for her to back me. the only reason she did not put me in foster care then was because of some issues the town was having with foster parents then. some scandal thing with a few houses getting shut down over serious charges. summer school was credit recovery and looking good on my stuff. my probation officer thought my parents were insane.
- aunt j showed up on my b day to give me her car to use before she went into jail and she and my mom got into another fist fight but this time in my bed. thats how i woke up on my 16th birthday. my mom didnt let me get a license because she thought if i could get a job i would run away again.
- summer school SS was there and he talked to me so that was good, but my inability to try to be friends with him was disturbing to me.
- C moved to texas and she was my best friend during those times i think. i said that to E at the jeebus school the next fall, how C was my best friend so she had to have been during the summer. i think. whatever. i was not happy she moved. the only person i had left to talk to was A's crazy self
- i found out i had to go to the jeebus school in the fall. i was not a happy camper.

sept - dec 93
-IB showed back up in town living with his boo thang.
- I dated TO and had a preg scare that made A go ballistic on me.
- S vanished due to pregnancy
- J went to prison for shooting that guy.
- I went to juvenile after going to get LD from her dad's house after he beat her senseless. A drove me and aunt J was going to hide LD for us until she could get it figured out. i was on probation from LD and my mom had me locked up over trying to help the girl...
- i got a license because my mom wouldnt get up in the morning to take me to school but still every time i had an interview lined up she threatened me with police if i left the house even when she said i could go apply for work. my probation officer got real pissed. i ended up in the runaway shelter again for awhile one time i managed to get a job and got hired... mom put me there so id get fired for not showing up to work.
- new years 93/94 i ended up with JT before he dropped me off with IB and his boo thang. i was going to run away to the capital with them, boo thang said his dad owned a place and would hire me and pay me under the table. cops found me the day we planned on leaving and i ended up in juvenile again. IB and boo thang moved and never did come back to town. last i saw them.

i got nothing for jan, feb, or march, but april 94 was when i got thrown out and parents said only place i could go was A's house. i left, got a job, and finished 11th grade at the jeebus school. A's house was bad... he was abusive and i ended up getting pregnant, tried to run away to texas with C.. A found out, that ended horribly for me, i ended up losing the baby, had the blow out with LD and all that. Oh and LD was dating a guy before that (J) and they were in my car and he punched her in the head and i lost it on him. i was living with A then because i could see LD w/o stressing being locked up for it.

Otay... think that's what I have so far... too many pieces of paper to flip through... but i think i got it.

-V