I think being direct is better than beating around the bush. I think practicing being direct with T and H and your friends would be a wonderful step forward. However, I wonder if it is really productive to continue individually contacting your MC in between sessions. I know when I've done couple's counseling, we were only allowed to contact our counselor together-- not individually outside of session. Even if MC allows and respond to it, it intensifies the dependence on MC instead of forcing you to learn to self-smooth or seek reassurance from your H or someone more appropriate. This seems to be one more way you are intensifying things with MC and preventing your marriage counseling from focusing on the relationship with your h.