Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. I haven't had words to reply.

It felt like I was caught in a three ring monkey circus. There are too many issues that I'm trying to sort out. I haven't felt like me, one of the rings of the circus, who is me anyway. I truly hope I find that answer.

I find such encouragement and understanding here. It's not this place, PC, that I don't belong. It's just being here, in this life and what I've experienced. It made little sense to me in the place I was.

There is a part of me that says, "I don't belong here." I'm thinking that it's a lot of me that gets overwhelmed and doesn't know how to deal or handle what's going on.

Thank you so much for hearing me!! It means much to me. The other parts of me are saying, "us too!"

Tonight was the last time that I met with my counselor in my safe place. I was numby. Not gone but not all there. I will be braver and go to the New place next week. It will be ok. I will be brave. I think this numby part will hang around until then.

There has to be a redemption at some point. A truth of why I'm here. A place of safety and belonging.

Thank you again for hearing me. I do feel safe here.